Scotch and Proud

 

 

With the Anniversary of the Battle of Bannockburn rapidly approaching, Visit Scotland have announced a range of souvenir goods to mark the occasion of mass English death. Capturing the higher end of the market will be authentic vials of English blood, charmingly housed in Celtic jewellery.

 

A spokesman for Visit Scotland, when asked for projected sales, simply wailed “Freeeeeeeedom.” In answer to Scotch and Proud's follow-up question of whether this could antagonise visitors from south of the border, the same answer was given.

 

It has been widely agreed as unfortunate and inconvenient that the anniversary of the skirmish will clash with the national referendum on independence.

 

Get yer blood here

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Scotch blood