Scotch and Proud


Pizza Hut target Scots with burger pizza

Pizza Hut's increasingly cynical marketing has been lambasted by Alex Salmond, on the day it’s been revealed that their 2,800 calorie "cheeseburger crust pizza" was designed specifically for the Scottish market. Instead of having the normal crust expected of a traditional pizza, this new variety has a crust with 10 succulent 100% British Beef burgers baked in it.


The svelte First Minister (a lifelong fitness fanatic) did not hold back in his criticism of this new lard-buster. "It's not that I don’t like both burgers and pizza - I do. It's also not that I don’t like combining the two - as I do. What I don’t like is the suggestion that Pizza Hut have identified Scots as the only nation with an appetite for such fare. I have no doubt it would be equally welcome in the other Celtic nations and as such the company can only be viewed as massive bigots.


Pizza Hut have so far been unavailable for comment but Glasgow chip shops have been left unimpressed, with more than one considering legal action after attempts at deep frying led to the pizzas simply sinking to the depths of the fryers, never to be seen again.


Scotch pizza